21. Legal. St. Paul College of Pasig. University of Sto. Tomass. BS-Biology. Biology Dance Squad. Hyperluu. Schizoid. Rational. hopeless romantic. diabetically sweet. nature lover. music freak. dance-aholic. bgirl?. alcohol. FOOD. iced tea. lemon chicken. yang-chao fried rice. pc. highlighter. books. movies. guns. chucks. cars. sports. extrovert. angst level=99%. jokes. humor. laughter. BEACH. illusion. a little bit of everything unconventional. RANDOM. i love my family. i love my friends.
live. laugh. love. learn. EAT.
You might be a big fish
In a little pond
Doesn't mean you've won
'Cause along may come
A bigger one
And you'll be lost
Coldplay - Lost
9:31 AM | Sunday, October 02, 2005
here we go again
another weekend of blogging and friendster-ing. :p i'm trying to keep up with the world after being cooped up in the dorm with no clue of the real life. help me live. oh my.
i'm starting to think deep again. as in complicatingly deep. a lot has been happening and i failed to think for one serious moment. good thing someone helped me out. (thaank yoou) but that was more talk and less thinking. that time, i was thinking out loud. my pent up anger and frustrations with the people around me. and my frustrated self being totally frustrated again. what the hell am i? a frustrated friend???? this is the problem with thinking too much, it's in every second that i just want to break down and cry. but noo.. that's NOT me. that's not the person they know. nobody knows the real me except myself. or do i? see??? and i freakin hate myself for ruining a perfectly good moment and for endlessly pretending that i'm stronger than before. that i can surpass anything without letting my emotions get a hold of me. i hate myself for not wanting to do better when i know i can. and i'm hating myself more for lying. lying not only to the people around me, but also lying to myself.
i might not be able to talk to people that much anymore. no, i don't need to be alone. i just need to stop talking for a while. hafta think. i've said too much. i've made too many mistakes. i thought i can do those things.. but i guess i got too comfortable.
time for a little rewind.
i'm starting from scratch.
back to the drawing board.
nobody knows i'm sensitive to everything
cry your heart out and hate yourself while your at it.
thank you kimm. for the hundred reasons. ever the procrastinator. haha